Handicapping the 2011 Cover Girl Candidates, Part One

I mentioned in my first post how I’d successfully predicted the last three cover girls. Perhaps it’s time I put my money where my mouth is. I’m going to try to guess who 2011 will bring us.

First, the last three years.

2008: Miller Time
This was a bit of a no-brainer. Marisa doesn’t do much for me personally (she’s hot, sure, but a bit of a cookie-cutter blonde). However, she’s insanely popular. It’s kind of surprising that she didn’t get the cover sooner, although the stunt covers of 2006 and 2007 may have pushed her back.

I predicted her in 2008 because I figured they couldn’t let a bona fide SI star fade before they put her on the cover, and I was right. Not only about the cover, but about the fade; it was (to date) her last swimsuit appearance.

It’s not an iconic cover, in my opinion. The facial expression is kind of bland and straightforward. The pose feels awkward, like she’s a little self-conscious and green, instead of a seven-year swimsuit issue veteran. The hip is thrust out, but kind of lazily. The arm is on the head, but somehow I don’t believe her. And she’s got that thumb-in-the-bikini-bottom thing that I kind of like but kind of wish SI wouldn’t rely on so often.

And the suit itself looks like it was knit for Etsy.

It is not, as this site claims, the same pose as 2000’s cover.Eerily similar outfits and settings, yes, but very different poses. I prefer Daniela’s pose (that, ladies, is how you thrust out a hip), though not her facial expression, which is even more lifeless than Marisa’s.

I flipped through some other Marisa pics from 2008, to see if there are any other shots that I felt would have made better covers.This one is hot, but it seems wrong for a cover, somehow. Maybe it’s the hat. It makes her look like she’s role-playing or something. (This is the only hat ever to appear on a swimsuit issue cover.)


This one is gorgeous, but maybe a little too overtly sexual for a cover.


This would have made an excellent cover, I think. It’s a much more dynamic pose and facial expression. And you still get to be risqué with the breasts, but a loosened top feels less gratuitous than a couple of delicately perched strands of beads.


This would have been my second choice. The previous one might be a bit lascivious, and this one is more wholesome. She’s still leveling her gaze at the camera, but the effect is warmer.

So there you have it, SI. I await your call as a cover consultant.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...